The Fed Zone: Reviewing WWF 1996

[ChristianCaged]

RAW #165

Date: 24 June 1996
Location: Brown County Expo; Green Bay, WI
Commentary: Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

When Sunny Met Kloudy

Off the back of a very good King of the Ring show, we can only hope the television product improves somewhat. Wishful thinking, perhaps. Vince and Jerry call the action.

Ahmed Johnson def. Hunter Hearst Helmsley (10:25 shown)
Non-title here, as Hunter is still being detained in loserville. Ahmed flies out of the traps as usual and batters Hunter all over the ring, but misjudges a charge and tumbles to the floor, where HHH meets him with a sweet baseball slide. That one was as smooth as butter. Hunter follows that up by hurling Ahmed into the steps. Back in the ring, Hunter comes off the top for a double-axe, after which we cut to Goldust. He seems to be looking past Ahmed and right at The Undertaker, which makes absolutely no sense but am I surprised? After the break, Ahmed catches HHH in a bear hug to steal back the momentum and then roughs him up with a SPINEBUSTER. Hunter is able to wriggle out of the Pearl River Plunge first time around and targets Ahmed's back some more, hoping to put himself in title contention. No joy though, as Ahmed catches him in the Pearl River Plunge position and drops him to win the match. This got plenty of time for a TV match but it didn't do much with it after an entertaining first few minutes. (*3/4)

Post-match, Dok Hendrix gets in the ring for an interview with Ahmed and reminds him of the fact that he is the first African-American Intercontinental Champion. Ahmed then proceeds to call himself the champion of the world, which sounds right given the name of the title but obviously isn't true. He'll give Goldust a rematch any time.

The Bodydonnas (w/Kloudy) def. The Brooklyn Brawler & Jerry Fox (3:57)
Why the hell is it spelled with a 'K'? Sunny joins us on commentary for this one and she seems pretty disgusted by Kloudy's presence. Something tells me she'd have a similar opinion on the trans debate today. In all seriousness, this Kloudy stuff is certified WrestleCrap and feels a lot like Vince trying to be edgy. After some back and forth, the Bodydonnas get themselves on top and Skip does a Jeff Jarrett strut! That feels like a weird reference to include here. Skip takes fox down with a Frankensteiner from the top and Zip finishes the match with the Whoopee Cushion. Squashy squash squash.

Post-match, Kloudy makes his way over the announce booth and sends Sunny running, before turning his attention to King and making him dive into the crowd. Just awful.

Vader, Owen Hart & The British Bulldog (w/Jim Cornette) def. Savio Vega, Aldo Montoya & Barry Horowitz (4:20)
Damn, they've shacked up Savio with the job squad for tonight. This guy beat Steve Austin on PPV just over a month ago! I guess someone else (probably Bob Holly) must have dropped out of this one last minute. Jim Cornette joins Vince and Jerry on commentary here as Bulldog goes to work on Savio, before tagging in Vader. Savio has some chutzpah and battles back, hit Vader with a spin kick and tagging in Aldo. Owen also enters the match and decks him with the flying leg lariat. Bulldog is in and he puts more pressure on Aldo with the vertical suplex. Vader gets a splash in the corner, Bulldog follows up with a power slam, and the decimation ends as Owen taps out poor Aldo with the Sharpshooter. Did Barry even get into the match here? Just an elevated squash but fun to see Camp Cornette come together to deliver a good beating. (*)

Brian Pillman is back (on crutches) for another wild promo, even though Vince tries to apologise for his comments at King of the Ring. After saying "goddamn", which is a swear word in America I guess, he demands that Vince give him the paycheck he's due. Good job he didn't join ECW then.

The Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer) def. Stone Cold Steve Austin via DQ (9:47 shown)
The fact that *this* match is headlining a random episode of RAW in 1996 is pretty funny to me. They're playing up a new storyline (well, Jerry is) about Paul Bearer potentially cracking Taker with the urn on purpose. If King is saying it, it can't possibly be true! An exchange of punches and a brawl to the floor kicks this one off, as Undertaker fires Austin right into the post and then sends him back inside for some choking action. They brawl some more outside before a break, and when we come back, Austin has Taker down in the ring. He targets the leg and puts Taker in a series of holds. Goldust and Marlena arrive now, so the screwy finish is pretty obvious if it wasn't already. Eventually Taker breaks free from Austin but after another break, Deadman misses the jumping clothesline and gives Stone Cold an opening. Austin tries to hit the Bossman straddle, but Taker dodges that. Can someone hit a move here! Taker obliges and nails Austin with the chokeslam, but before he can capitalise, Goldust blinds him with...wait for it...gold dust! The referee sees it and DQs Austin. Pretty dull stuff as both guys were no doubt exhausted from their exertions the previous night and clearly phoned this one in. I can't blame them considering the finish. (*1/2)

Post-match, Taker sends King of the Ring Austin packing and does his patented pose with Paul Bearer. I guess Jerry had some bad information! King tries to get a word with Taker after the match but let's just say that's not successful. And that's all for this week!

Live episodes of RAW used to be okay, or certainly better than the rest of the taping, but the lack of effort put into these shows (even with WCW already starting to destroy WWF in the ratings) is absolutely astonishing. Not the worst of the worst but a poor edition this week. Thumbs down.

NEXT WEEK: The Rockers meet again for one-on-one action!

 

[ChristianCaged]

RAW #166

Date: 1 July 1996
Location: Brown County Expo; Green Bay, WI (taped)
Commentary: Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

Marty gets rocked and Sunny gets slopped!

Back in the Green Bay for the first taped episode of this cycle, as the build to International Incident continues. Vince McMahon and Jerry Lawler are on the call as usual.

Shawn Michaels (w/Jose Lothario) def. Marty Jannetty (w/Leif Cassidy & Jim Cornette) (15:15 shown)
Jim Cornette has teamed up with the New Rockers tonight because he HATES Shawn Michaels. Hot start to this one, as HBK and Marty trade strikes and holds, but neither can get the upper hand. Eventually Jannetty socks HBK hard and Leif looks excited at ringside. HBK responds immediately though and sends Marty running to the outside. After a breather, Marty launches another assault, but Shawn nails him with an atomic drop and decks him with a clothesline. The double-axe off the top follows, but Cassidy pulls his partner out to avoid an early shower for Jannetty. Shawn decides to take matters into his own hands and baseball slides Cassidy into the barrier, which gives Marty an opening to sledge Michaels from the apron. Back inside, Marty grabs a quick REST HOLD as we go to the commercials. After the break, Shawn wriggles out of the chin lock, but charges right into the corner and gets the worst of it. Marty then makes the same error and bumps all over the place. Shawn gets him in position now for a monkey flip, but Marty lands on his feet impressively and drops his former partner with a clothesline. Marty goes high for a fist drop, but Shawn raises the boot and Jannetty eats sole. Shawn powers up, hitting the flying forearm before going for a power bomb. That doesn't quite work, as Marty gets a headscissors off, but Shawn reverses it into a roll-up for a near fall. Marty then rolls through on a crossbody and gets two. After another break, we come back to see Marty hit the Rocker Dropper for a nice bit of nostalgia, but Shawn evades the fist drop follow-up. Marty goes for a suplex instead, but Shawn escapes it and nails his opponent with a piledriver! The flying elbow drop follows and Sweet Chin Music finishes it. A fun match on RAW for a change, even though HBK and Jannetty are so wildly far apart in the food chain by now that Marty going 50-50 with his former partner seems vaguely ridiculous. (***1/4)

Post-match, Cassidy comes in to avenge his partner, so HBK rocks him with Sweet Chin Music as well. Cornette decides to give it a go as well with his racket, only for Jose Lothario to steam in and punch him in the face.

We go back to last week's edition of Superstars now, for the next chapter in the Sunny-Godwinns saga. After declaring that she loves Phineas and getting him to say it in return, Sunny slaps the poor guy and berates him. The Smoking Gunns then make the attack, only for Henry Godwinn and Hillbilly Jim to make the save. Sunny then finds herself all at sea as Phineas has the slop bucket. It seems like he can't bring himself to dump the sludge on Sunny, but she blows a sarcastic kiss and that pushes him over the edge. Would be mildly funny if they hadn't run the slop gimmick into the ground already.

Mankind def. Duke Droese (4:12 shown)
Dumpster always appears out of nowhere for a match and then disappears for months. I can't imagine he'll be in the promotion for too much longer. Jake Roberts joins commentary for this one, as he's facing Mankind at In Your House for some reason. Unfortunately, this whole thing is just an excuse for Jake and Lawler to bicker about the former's alcoholism, which is clearly leading to a match that precisely nobody wants to see. Anyway, after 20 seconds of Mankind choking Droese out in the corner, we go to a break. After the break, Mankind continues to chip away at Dumpster, until the latter catches him out with a spinebuster. He then puts Mankind in a sleeper and a bear hug, but Mankind breaks out of that and catches Duke in the Mandible Claw. And that's lights out. A pretty meaningless squash here. Mankind has beaten Undertaker, he gains nothing anymore from wins over Duke Droese. (1/2*)

Post-match, things boil over between Roberts and Lawler, as Jerry slaps Jake twice and gets himself caught in a stranglehold. Mankind is on hand to save Jerry's ass though, as he attacks Roberts with the Mandible Claw while Jerry stands on his face. The referees eventually break it up and carry Jake out of there. It's not the first time he's been carried out, says Lawler.

Goldust (w/Marlena) def. Marc Mero (w/Sable) (12:36 shown)
Rotating commentary continues here as Austin joins the announce desk. They keep putting Stone Cold in this position, which tells me that Vince was already super confident in his ability to talk and get stuff over. Austin will face Mero again at International Incident, while Lawler reveals that Marlena is taking an interest in Sable! Mero goes right for the jugular early and hits a crossbody for a near fall, but Goldust escapes the ring and stalls as we go to an early break. After that, Goldust has Mero caught in a headlock, which is seemingly less important than Marlena having the hots for Sable. The action spills out to the floor now, where Goldust rams Mero face-first into the stairs. Back inside, Mero scores a two count with a roll-up, but Goldust seizes control back with a fist drop. After another break, Goldust has Mero in a REST HOLD, but this time Mero escapes and decks Goldie with an electric chair. Mero starts to build up a head of steam now, but Marlena zones in on Sable and distracts Mero, who wards Marlena away from his wife. Goldust takes advantage and gets Mero in position for the Curtain Call, which is enough for a win. Pretty boring match here, as Goldust was just doing REST HOLDS for most of the duration and the Sable/Marlena stuff, along with Austin on commentary, was more of a focus. (*1/4)

Austin mocks Mero for losing on commentary, and that's all we have time for. This PPV just seems like it's full of story-less, random matches and they expect people to care?!

A better episode than last week by virtue of the HBK-Jannetty match, but WWF is in a creative hole right now and, as they would discover in just a few days, at the worst possible time. Thumbs down.

NEXT WEEK: Owen Hart clashes with The Ultimate Warrior!

 

[ChristianCaged]

RAW #167

Date: 8 July 1996
Location: Brown County Expo; Green Bay, WI (taped)
Commentary: Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

Warrior's End

So, Hulk Hogan has just turned heel at Bash at the Beach and christened the New World Order. No pressure, Vince.

We begin the show with an announcement from Gorilla Monsoon, who reveals that The Utlimate Warrior is suspended after missing a bunch of dates and won't be brought back until he pays an appearance bond. However, he will wrestle tonight (a.k.a. we taped this shit weeks ago).

Vince and Jerry call the action as usual.

The Ultimate Warrior def. Owen Hart (w/Jim Cornette) via DQ (8:48 shown)
Warrior does not pay the appearance bond and won't return to the company until he is inducted into the Hall of Fame, right before he dies. This is his final match in the WWF ever. Before the action begins, we cut to WWF Studios, where HBK and Ahmed Johnson are waiting for their third man to arrive ahead of International Incident. Warrior is totally in control to start this one, firing off a series of clotheslines. Owen makes a comeback and nails Warrior with the flying leg lariat, but Warrior totally no sells that. Warrior takes Owen down with a suplex and goes for a Warrior Splash to finish it, but Owen gets the knees up to give him some hope and finally knock the wind out of Warrior. Following the break, Cornette helps Owen stay on top by popping Warrior in the throat with his tennis racket. Owen then decks Warrior with an enziguri and taunts the crowd. Cheer this man! He fires off a missile dropkick but Warrior kicks at two. Owen then tries to apply a Sharpshooter, but Warrior breaks free of that. British Bulldog has arrived and I'm guessing he's up to no good. Warrior powers up and starts decking Owen with clotheslines again, but he can't finish him off as Bulldog interferes and forces the DQ. Not too bad for a late-era Warrior match but hardly any good and you just knew the bullshit was coming a mile off. (*1/2)

Post-match, Vader joins the party and — with Shawn Michaels and Ahmed Johnson nowhere to be seen — the heels just decimate Warrior, culminating in a VADER BOMB. The referees carry Warrior out and that's the last we'll see of him. Well, in the WWF anyway.

Meanwhile, HBK and Ahmed do some more teasing of their third man. The way Warrior was just buried throughout all of this is pretty funny actually.

Savio Vega def. Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw (w/Uncle Zebekiah) (12:33 shown)
During Savio's entrance, Pillman tries to attack him with one of his crutches and gets warded off by a bunch of referees and stooges. He's crazy, I tell ya! Bradshaw gets the first shot in anger here, but Savio recovers and levels him with a spinning heel kick. Bradshaw responds by booting Savio to the floor and applying a REST HOLD to wear his opponent down. That's pretty typical of this long, almost impossibly boring match, which is a mere backdrop for Vince and Jerry to speculate about who HBK and Ahmed's partner will be. The Outsiders storyline, this is not. After some Bradshaw heat, Savio tries for a comeback and launches a dropkick, but Bradshaw bats him away. Savio gets caught in a sleeper now, but has the ring awareness to drop and rock Bradshaw with a jawbreaker. Mr. Perfect calls in now, but the conversation goes nowhere and we head into a break. After that, Bradshaw gets on top and drops Savio with a slam, but he can only get two. A flying shoulderblock wins him another near fall, but Savio won't give in. Eventually, Bradshaw and Zebekiah mess up, as the latter trips Savio and causes Bradshaw to miss a clothesline. Savio capitalises and hits the spinning heel kick for three. This was not badly worked or anything but so dull and monotonous, with not an ounce of heat. And why would there be? It's not like they've done anything to make us care about either of these guys. (3/4*)

Seems like Shawn and Ahmed are still waiting for their guy to arrive. I suspect we'll be waiting for the show to end to find out.

Vader & The British Bulldog (w/Jim Cornette) def. The Godwinns (w/Hillbilly Jim) (13:37 shown)
Cornette joins commentary for this one and gets hot at Vince for spreading the Godwinns' dirt to him. Fair enough I guess. Henry starts off with Vader and manages to reverse a suplex to give the babyfaces an advantage. Phineas gets in on the action now and scores two off a splash. He then bites Vader in the corner! Is this guy crazy! Vader is hot and breaks free by clotheslining the shit out of Phineas, before tagging in Bulldog. He puts the pressure on Henry with a REST HOLD, but the hog farmer powers out, only for Bulldog to deck him with a knee. Vader gets in to the ring again and splats HOG with a splash, but he's able to kick out. Henry recovers now as Cornette leaves commentary and gets into the zone, but he can't stop Henry hitting a back suplex. That doesn't keep Vader down for long though, as he knocks Henry to the mat and Vader Bombs his back! A nice near fall there. After the break, Vader avalanches Henry in the corner and goes for another, but in the moment of the match, Henry captures the monster mid-air and slams him to a pop! Phineas gets the tag now and runs wild, as the match becomes pure chaos (exacerbated by an apoplectic Jim Cornette, who is back on the call and refers to his own team as idiots). Henry and Phineas are both in the ring, and as the referee wards Henry out, Vader destroys PIG with a clothesline. That allows Bulldog to hoist him up for a running powerslam and it's over. Hey, that was a fun and surprisingly competitive tag team match, which overcome the obviousness of the outcome to deliver some big meaty men slapping meat. (**1/2)

Backstage, Cornette is feeling pretty happy with himself but it's time to reveal the third man! We go to split-screen, and Cornette's face goes white as Shawn and Ahmed unveil THE MASTER AND RULER OF THE WORLD Sycho Sid! Typically manic promo from Sid here, followed by a hilarious breakdown from Jim who is terrified for his team at In Your House! And that's all for this week.

Pretty average episode but a fun segment at the end and a decent main event make it the best episode of this taping so far. Thumbs in the middle.

NEXT WEEK: The Smoking Gunns get title shots!

 

[ChristianCaged]

RAW #168

Date: 15 July 1996
Location: Brown County Expo; Green Bay, WI (taped)
Commentary: Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

Clash of the champions!

It's the end of the taping (thank the lord) and the last stop on our way to Vancouver for IYH: International Incident. Vince and Jerry host.

Intercontinental Championship: Ahmed Johnson (c) def. Bart Gunn (w/Sunny) (11:26 shown)
Ahmed and Bart engage in a handshake to begin, but it's all a ruse and Bart clotheslines him to the floor. Bart goes to work on the arm of Ahmed for a while (well, for most of this match), as we see Shawn watching on from the back. No Sid?! Ahmed works his way out of the arm wringer for a bit and charges at Bart, but it whiffs and Bart steals a two count before applying the hammerlock again. Ahmed once again escapes and this time hits a powerslam for a near fall, but after a break he's back in the hold. This is just wrestling on auto-pilot. Bart hits a bulldog for two as things pick up a bit, but that only gets two and Ahmed battles back. The big man hits the spinebuster and Bart is decked for good by the Pearl River Plunge as Ahmed gets three. A really dull match that didn't use the 10+ minutes it received purposefully at all. Not that anyone thought Bart Gunn had a chance here anyway. (3/4*)

We go backstage now for a word with HBK, who looks ahead to his match with Billy Gunn later tonight and assures us that he can, in fact, trust Sid. I wouldn't be so sure.

Marc Mero (w/Sable) def. T.L. Hopper (9:12 shown)
Ah, the RAW debut of the wrestling plumber. That'll show WCW. To be fair to him, he's not actually a bad worker. Vince clearly finds it funny though to mock people with everyday jobs from his ivory tower of deviance. Anyway, Goldust's usher tries to hand a gift to Sable on her way to the ring with Mero but they just leave it on the floor, haha. Mero and Hopper exchange headlocks to begin, until Hopper cheap shots Mero and starts to beat him down. Mero has a few shots at a comeback, but Hopper stays on top. Following the break, the plumber actually gets a near fall off a leg drop, but his attempt at a splash misses and Mero fights back, taking down his opponent with a headscissors. The Kiss That Don't Miss follows and Hopper is out for the three count. A very basic match here to introduce Hopper and put Mero over. Leave this stuff on Superstars or whatever. (*)

Jim Cornette cuts a promo now, hyping the main event at the PPV as only he can. Camp Cornette have a plan for Sid!

UNDERTAKER MUSIC VIDEO!

WWF Championship: Shawn Michaels (c) (w/Jose Lothario) def. Billy Gunn (w/Sunny) (11:56 shown)
This is one of those matches that probably would have happened in 1999 or something and meant a lot more if Michaels didn't get hurt. Billy takes down the champ off a couple of shoulderblocks early on, until Shawn works him out to the floor. Sunny isn't impressed by that and lets Shawn know, so he kisses her. You'll have to wait a bit longer for those Sunny days HBK. Shawn takes control now as Billy can't get near him, although he does avoid Sweet Chin Music. He does manage to get back into it eventually, hitting the Rocker Dropper to score a near fall. Shawn recovers and works Billy into the corner, before dropping to the outside and posting his knackers. Ouch! A slingshot clothesline follows and HBK is officially back on top. He makes the mistake of going high, however, and Billy meets him there to slam him to the mat. Following the break, Billy has Shawn caught in a REST HOLD. HBK battles out of it, but Billy whips him hard into the corner and Shawn sells it like death. Billy hoists HBK up now for the TREE OF WOE as Sunny looks very happy with herself. Meanwhile, Camp Cornette are leaving the building. As we come back, Shawn begins to fire up and goes through the gears, hitting the forearm, elbow drop and finally Sweet Chin Music to dash Billy's hopes. That's a three count. This was okay and easily better than the IC Title match earlier in the show, although Billy had no chance here and it was all a bit of a procession. (**)

Post-match, Shawn returns to the back and finds Ahmed, before Cornette reveals he didn't actually leave and goads the babyfaces into an ambush by Vader, Bulldog and Owen. Just as it looks like they're outnumbered, Sid wheels in with his car and makes the save. And that's the episode.

A fun pre-taped finish there but overall a really boring episode again. You have to believe that with the NWO officially off to the races, the next set of tapings will be more interesting. Thumbs down.

NEXT WEEK: The aftermath of International Incident!